..butterflies..birthdays...brighton...

I feel like I have constant butterflies lately. Im trying to control them but they are making me all anxious all the time! It's hard to distract oneself.

I feel all sorts at once. Worried. Excited. Panicked. Just very strange in general.

Birthday was pleasant. Included a trip to Brighton and a meal.

Got to go to Seth Lakeman / Suzanne Vega gig for free which was awsome but legs were killing after a total of about 4 hours standing. Im glad that in the face of negatvity (unexpected financial complications) we managed to enjoy it. I do not need anymore regrets.

We will get through it. We always do.

And so it begins...and I broke my glasses

Firstly I want to thank all who came to our leaving birthday do. It was so wonderful to have you all there. It's not goodbe forever, you're in our hearts always.

The house is done! I promised Daniel I would chill as soon as we got in the car to leave as I would be so happy it was all done. However I just started worrying about the trip!

What an adventure is coming our way.

Saying goodbye to grandparents was emotional.

I hope we can chill a little now!

I lost my balance and my hand landed on my glasses on the dining table and I completely screwed up the arm. Trip to opticians tomorrow :(

I have to thank everyone who contributed to my birthday pressie - a dslr camera! its an olympus E 500!

photos to follow when Im less tired!

I survived the dentist

I promised Daniel I would be brave, and I really tried, I had the words I WILL be brave running through my head!

It really wasnt as bad as I had imagined in my head. The injection wasnt bad at all. although I was tearful it didnt hurt as much as I'd remembered. She did use the special gel tho which she said wouldnt make a lot of difference but took the edge of it.

The dental nurse was fab, constantly encouraging me and saying we were nearly done, no more drilling now etc!

I would say even the smaller drill was not so bad, the bigger one was the hardest bit. Such heavy vibrations in ones head was not good. But it was only for a few seconds.

So it's done yay.

Now on to the other million and one things I have to get done.

moving house is stressful

I am so stressed. I feel sick. I want tocurl up in bed til it's all over.

I think a lot of it is to do with being alone a lot ....no fault of mr kit, he is working 12 hour shifts to keep the money coming in and I really appreciate it.
If you're reading Mr Kit, thanks for keeping me going! I love you.

Also it's D day tomorrow. (dentist)

I cant bear it. Ive been advised to get rescue rememdy so I might give it a whirl!

Dos and dont's

I dont want to...

have to pack anymore

have to go to the dentist for a filling.

have to stress about it all

have to go to the dentist for a filling

have to be so drained

Did I mention the dentist?

I do...

Want to travel

Want to experience new things

Want to meet new people

Want to have a pool, jacuzi and gym at my feet

Want to start a new adventure with Daniel

Want to have my own class

Want to show someone Im a good teacher

Want Emma to stay in Charlotte

Want to fly with Daniel, or Emma. Not gonna happen!

Want it to be July 31st.

Not that Im asking for much.

Emma

Im so happy for my friend Emma. Ive spent the last few months getting to know her because we were both going to Charlotte USA to teach together. This has been in person and online and it really made me feel confident about going.
This kinda went a bit wrong through no fault of hers at all and for a while now she (and I) have been depressed and extremely worried about the situation.
Imagine how happy I was to get a phonecall this evening to say it's kinda fixed! Although she wont be on my flight, she will be getting there the same time as me - well about an hour earlier - so I will have a buddy.
Hopefully the rest of the details will work out great.
Emma - Im glad you're sharing this adventure with me. I thought I was going it alone for a while!

They'll never know.

People can wonder.
They can dream.
They can imagine.
They can cry.
They can want.
But they can't have.

Only I will ever know. And Im so glad.

They will never know. For it's not theirs to know.

3 weeks to go

Hi everyone (well Bryher at least) sorry Im sorry I a mrubbish but been so so busy.
It's 3 weeks tomorrow til I fly out to the USA, intially to Raleigh for my orientation then on to Charlotte by bus.
I feel like there is so much to do although so much has been done.

I have to offer heartfelt thanks to all the family who have helped so much in trips to the tip and in the attic! I have to give a special shout out to my sis in law Kerry who the very day she returned from South Africa soent most of her first day back in our attic nimbly stacking boxes. Thanks Kerry and welcome home.

Im really focusing on packing up the house. Daniel is working all hours of the day like 12 hour shifts so it's quite draining.

We are both looking forward to the future howver as usual I have worries! Not bad enough worries to make me not want to go but niggles!

1. going on my own! Im rubbish at doing things alone and i know it. So that will be fun.
2. Driving automatic and abroad!
3. money! always a worry.
4. my grandparents. I can't say anymore about that or I will most likely cry. :-(

otherwise im so excited. we are hoping to live at timbers.us. check it out. It has a pool, a gym and even a jogging trail. Yay.

I also have to give a shout out to my father in law and financial advisor Francis who has done an amazing job for us.
All the family have been so great. I can't thank you enough.
Thanks to B and B for an amazing meal as well. I will miss you guys.